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We’ve all done it. You pick up the magic 8-ball, ask your question, give it a shake, and get…“Don’t count on it.” So what do you do?

You shake it again, obviously.

Getting a bad reading is kind of an occupational hazard in the tarot world. You pick up the cards with a question burning in your mind, and the cards just don’t tell you what you thought they would. I understand. So here are a few ways to deal with a spread that seems to say negative things about you or your question.

Make up a meaning. Don’t like what a card is telling you? Come up with your own interpretation! Is that Death card in your relationship spread sending a message you don’t like? Well, now Death means taking a trip to the ice-cream shoppe. Tarot reading is fun when you can make the cards mean whatever you want them to!

Ignore it. If a card seems to be saying something you disagree with, remove it from the spread. You can either ignore it completely or shove it back into the deck and draw a new card to replace it. Tarot cards don’t know how to handle rejection, and are very needy and eager to please.  Chances are the next time you draw the card it will have much more pleasant things to say.

Insult the card’s mother. Tarot cards are very sensitive, so a good way to get one to do what you want is to make it feel bad about itself. Self-esteem issues are rampant among tarot cards, and they tend to cave easily under pressure. For good measure, make sure to mention its bad complexion and weight issues.

Put the card in time-out. Sometimes the best way to discipline a negative tarot card is to remove it from your deck for a few weeks. See how your deck feels without the card in it. You may decide to do without the card from now on. Make sure to tell the card’s friends that they’re better off without that loser.

Burn your deck. Sometimes the cards get together to conspire against you. If your deck gives you too many bad readings, it may be time to teach your cards about the Ultimate Sacrifice. Burning your deck will purify all the negative energy that it has accumulated talking about you behind your back. Just make sure to do it indoors in a well-ventilated area.

So I hope these tips have been helpful for you. If these solutions don’t work for you, don’t give up! It may be time to get creative. If this post gets enough likes I will release part two in this 17-part series of “What To Do About Your Tarot.” Don’t forget to comment, rate, and subscribe!

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2 Comments

  1. Next time I get a shitty reading, I’ll flick my lighter a few times just as a warning

    • For best effect, make sure to burn your favorite shirt/pants/dress in front of it, so it knows you’re not playing around. If you aren’t going to spare your favorite article of clothing in your righteous wrath, it can bet you sure as hell aren’t going to spare some dinky tarot cards.

      Much love, stay blessed, namaste, kthxbai.


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